Every long-term relationship begins with that first date. But not every first date is going to lead to a long-term relationship. It might also have been several years since you’ve been on a first date. That is nothing to stress out about. If a first date is on your social calendar, then you might want to take a moment for a little refresher course on how to impress a date. It’s actually quite easy.
Tip #1: Be Yourself
Yes, we all know that one. In fact, it is drilled into our collective conscious nearly every day. On a first date, it’s very important that the person showing up is going to be the person they’ll be spending time with. In other words, be yourself. If you did any “fibbing” on your online dating profile, then now is the time to come clean. If you like sports, then talk about that. If you like geek stuff, then talk about that. Remember, anything you say on this first date is going to be remembered. No pressure. Just relax.
Tip #2: Have Conversation Starters Ready
You don’t need to write down your conversation starters but this first date is where you find out about each other. A perfect starter would be, “What is on your playlist?” Or “What book are you currently reading?” That can open the door for a lot of conversation. Just be ready to jump in with one of your starters if you fall into the dreaded “silent zone.” Actually, if you do fall into the dreaded silent zone, then make a joke about it.
Tip #3: Dress for Success
Even though tip #1 is, be yourself, that doesn’t automatically mean dress like you would for a Sunday afternoon at home, i.e. sweatpants and faded T-shirt. You’ve got one shot at making a positive first impression. Dress casual in something you’ll feel comfortable in. That means no new shoes that haven’t been broken in!
Tip #4: Don’t Over Share
TMI. Too much information. A lot of folks tend to ramble when they get nervous. That is understandable but you don’t want to give everything away on that first date. Even though the topic of dating and relationships might pop up, try to avoid dwelling on all the times you have had your heart broken. That is especially true if you’re just coming out of a relationship. You’ll get to share those stories later on but for the first date, you want to keep it light.
Tip #5: Always Be Listening
This is probably the most important tip of all the first date tips: Listen. How many times have you heard a friend describe someone as a “good listener?” That is usually how they are describing someone they are attracted to. Listening means you’re not trying to think about the next thing you’re going to say at the exclusion of hearing what you date has to say. Just take in what is being said. Ask follow up questions and allow your date to take the conversation lead.
When was your last first date and how did it go?