It used to be that you would move in with a significant other only after you were married. Today, plenty of couples are taking the commitment plunge by moving in together. Whether that leads to marriage depends on the couple but it will certainly be a learning experience for both sides. That is why it is important to set up your boundaries before moving in together. This is even more important if you’re sharing a small space or one of you is moving into the other person’s place.
Here’s what you need to discuss before moving day:
The majority of couples share their meals and food together. However, the concept of sharing might be new to you. There could be some snacks or treats that provide you with a certain amount of comfort and you always want them within ready reach. It helps to let your partner know. That is not so much to say those things would be “off limits” but to make sure when they are running low that they get replenished.
Set Up Quiet Time
Just because you’re moving in together and will be sharing a lot doesn’t mean that sharing has to be around the clock. It might be helpful to set up a distinct quiet time. Maybe you need to come home and decompress from work before diving into sharing. You might not be a terrific morning person and would prefer that quiet time until the first cup of coffee. You might not discover the need for quiet time until you’re actually living together and working out the routines. Once it is established, it will be easy to honor on both sides.
Make a Chore List
Living on your own meant you had to do all the cleaning, cooking and upkeep. Now you can share in those responsibilities. “Share” is the operative word here. It will help to set up an even distribution of the weekly chores that way no one will feel overwhelmed. It might be that you do them together. There might also be someone who prefers things to be cleaned a certain way. If that is not your way, then you need to adjust. Is it really worth a spat over a messy microwave?
Schedule Different Nights Out
This goes back to the idea that you don’t have to share every moment with your significant other just because you’re not living together. There might be a night out wit the “boys” or “girls” that you want to maintain. You might also want some solitary time just to be out on your own. If you can coordinate those alone times to be in sync, then you’ll both be the better for it.